Addition To The Golf Omnibus

If parody is the sincerest form of flattery then Sally Jenkins has elevated P.G. Wodehouse to the top of the foot stool  at  Hyde Park’s Speakers Corner with her tongue-in-cheek criticism of the recent USGA/R & A ruling that bans the anchored putting method.

Now pay attention this is serious business!

Now pay attention this is serious business!!!!

As only a gifted writer can do, Jenkins captures the pure voice of P.G.’s Oldest Member  describing the absurd heightened sense of importance of this latest ruling to the quash the imminent threat this method presents to the sacred game of golf.

“He would no doubt regard Ernie Els, Webb Simpson, and Adam Scott with their elbows splayed, and wonder how on earth adopting a position that looks like a man standing over a floor mirror admiring himself as he ties a bow tie while also buttoning his overcoat….could be a help rather than a hindrance”.

“The anchored putter would seem less of an illegal tool…than simply a farcical and unsightly expression of desperation, a cry for help from those too unsteady to take a free swing.”

She then takes on the comic rhetorical antics of Sergio and Tiger accusing each other of who-knows-what antics for who-knows-why reason.

“But we are finding out what Garcia is really like: ignorant, and dagger mean.”

“In response, Woods strove to restore a tone of golf gentility, all punctilious decorum on Twitter”.

Great stuff……..P.G. is rolling and chortling in his grave.

(Click to read Sally Jenkins Wash Post entertaining piece on anchored putting)

Sally Jenkins

Washington Post

May, 2013

Sex Appeal

“No offense, Arnold, but I think she’s going to sell more tea than you.”

Dow Finsterwald, 1958 PGA Champ, commenting when he heard SI Swimsuit model Kate Upton might be in a commercial with Arnold Palmer for his famous 1/2 lemonade-1/2 iced tea drink.

Golf World

April, 2013

Bedlam Returns

To those who have played the 16th at TPC Scottsdale in the annual Waste Management Phoenix Open, it is like playing at the Red Sox post 2004 World Series riot inside of Fenway during the game.  No cars will be turned over and torched but you could light the breath of 80% of those in attendance.  There is nothing like it anywhere else on the PGA Tour.

Bo Van Pelt said that steeping out of the tunnel to the teeing area is the modern sports equivalent of stepping into the Roman Gladiator ring.  About 30,000 crazies with Caesar McCord giving the thumbs up or thumbs down.  All this hoopla for professionals hitting a knock-down 9-iron into a 162 yard par 3 that doesn’t even have a water hazard.

Over the years this hole has seen it’s share of The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly-Tiger’s Ace in 1997,  some really impaired synchronization of the wave, and Ian Poulter giving the crowd the one-finger salute after missing a short birdie putt.

Bedlam always prevails.  The guy with the “Quiet Please” paddle is about as relevant as Tiger’s body guard at a Sorority Mixer.

The Golf Channel

January, 2011

Sober Advice

Notice

The suggestion book will now be kept
behind the bar and available therefore
from the staff, who have been instructed
not to release the book to members who
have been drinking excessively.

Jon Bennett, Secretary

Sign posted in the 110-year old clubhouse of the Leven Course in Scotland,
the twelfth oldest golf club in the world.

Scotland Where Golf Is Great

James W. Finegan

October, 2012

Letting His Hair Down

Jesper Parnevik is the son of a Swedish Vaudeville style entertainer and the attached birthday video he did for his friend Brenda shows that entertaining runs in his blood.  Along with a cast of thousands including his kids, wife, and tour buddies Dustin Johnson, Richard Johnson, Will MacKenzie, Fredrick Jacobson, and Marc Turnesa, Jesper directed, produced, and edited this colorful extravaganza.

The man has style if not a lot of hair.

(Click to enjoy Jesper’s Gangnam Style dance video)

Jesper Parnevik

U-tube Video

October, 2012

Military Protocol

Playing a round recently with members of the military I quickly came to understand that for the highest ranking officer in our group there was no time limit when searching for his ball.

October, 2012

Cup Twitterings

One would think that recounting three days of Ryder Cup tweets would be a mundane read of fossilized observations.  But this is Dan Jenkins and his observations are never mundane and usually prescient.

You will get a chuckle out of his time phase thoughts on subjects like club house architecture, fashion statements, game no-shows, play late-shows, production decisions, and other successes and failures.

 (Click to read the Ryder Cup Tweets of Dan Jenkins)

Dan Jenkins

golfdigest.com

September, 2012

 

Mindset For Golf

Excessive golfing dwarfs the intellect.  Nor is this to be wondered at when we consider that the more fatuously vacant the mind is, the better for play…Next to the idiotic, the dull unimaginative mind is the best for golf.

Sir Walter Simpson

The Art of Golf (1887)

Quoted in: Grounds For Golf

Geoff Shackelford (2003)

The Humor Of Golf

The humor of golf is a divine comedy in the deeper sense.  Like all sources of laughter it lies in contrast and paradox; in the thought of otherwise grave men gravely devoting hours and money to a technique which so often they, apparently alone, do not know they can never master.  The solemnity of the eternal failure is vastly comic.  The perpetualness of their hope is nobly humorous.

R. C. Robertson-Glaskow (1901-1965)

Quoted in: Grounds For Golf

Geoff Shackelford (2003)